With as much of a clue about what is going on as Jade North at a set piece comes ‘This Week in Australian Football’.

Tony Popovic’s youngest son had a minor incident at school today, kicked out of band practice for not bringing an instrument. Apparently, the son’s triangle could not be found that morning because nobody in the Popovic household has three points.

Ruben Zadkovich caused quite a stir on the weekend, sent off after just 17 seconds after coming on as a substitute against Wellington Phoenix. Some called it vicious, others reckless and stupid. When asked what was going through his head, Zadkovich revealed that he got himself subbed on and sent off to collect an appearance bonus during the commercial break of Mythbusters. “I really wanted to find out if toast really does fall butter side down more often than not. It doesn’t!” The myth of Zadkovich as a good signing clearly has not been busted yet.

Mike Mulvey was relieved of his position this week at Brisbane Peugeot FC, seven months after winning the A-League Grand Final. “I probably should have won the World Cup and they might have kept me,” lamented Mulvey. We think that a totally different factor was at play here, being that Mulvey might not want to ever have lunch with Frank Farina again before training if he wants to keep his employment in future.

Real Madrid has been confirmed to be visiting Victoria at the end of the season to play some matches in a tournament format. Kevin Muscat is quiet on the prospect of a friendly against the world giants, keeping his feet on the ground for the first time in his football career.

Tim Cahill once again was the only Australian forward able to put the ball in the back of the net during Australia’s 2-1 defeat at the hands of Japan. His ability is being harnessed both on and off the pitch by his young striker teammates who have asked Cahill to assist them as a role model in all aspects of life, even starting their young families. Cahill is perfect for this role, being the only Australian in the side capable of driving hard into the box and scoring.

Join us next week when we find out who the next coach is to get fired despite their elapsed matches since winning trophies being able to be counted on their trembling fingers. Tony, we are looking in your direction!

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Despite having robbed Leigh Broxham of the ball in Year 10 inter-school soccer Kyle is still a twenty-something awaiting take-off on an illustrious footballing career. In the meantime he can be found bashing his head against a wall watching Arsenal and Melbourne Victory pass the ball sideways and being a pest on Twitter.