With the first weekend of football now complete you’ve again received your membership packs late, regardless of when you renewed your season ticket. A cheap looking scarf or baseball cap is sitting proudly on your floor somewhere, and a sticker is covered in a pile of opened mail. The Hyundai A-League has returned; with venom.

After last weekend there’s no way you’ll want to keep watching the A-League. Here’s why:

 

Faty ain’t a fatty

There’s nothing worse than false advertising, and this takes the cake. If only that was what Jacques Faty was doing over the off season at every opportunity, for he is no more a fat man than David Gallop is a public speaker.

 

Newcastle could be somebody

What you really want in a season is a clear narrative. It’s why the English Premier League is so successful. If you know who is going to be there or thereabouts at the end of the year not only do you know who to bet the hard-earned on – as is the culture in our fine yet fiscally inept country – but you also learn which football strip to buy. The Jets upsetting Wellington is unsettling and unfortunately that’s unnerving.

 

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Roar look likely

We’ve seen this before and it’s only going to end in another Grand Final showdown at Suncorp Stadium. No one wants that. We’re not quite sure how Brisbane played so well under John I’m everywhere Aloisi but if Kevin Muscat can manage an A-League side to a Championship then if can’t be too hard a task. Regardless, Roar have set a pace and you might as well start investigating early bird flights to Queensland around May.

 

Your team lost and that’s it, you’re out

The sadness that all Phoenix, Wanderers and Glory fans feel right now following their team’s opening round loss means that they should never attend a game again. Ever. This one match is an indication of how your season will be and it can’t possibly be turned around from here.

 

Carney has ducks in a line

The White Pele had an excellent game in midfield for Newcastle Jets and this should only remind us that not so long ago he took to the pitch as a left back for the Socceroos. The mere memory of this blonde spot on football history should be enough to leave you feeling like burning that membership you got in the mail yesterday.

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