It seems the election of an underqualified man to one of the highest positions in the world has inspired others to reach for the stars.

The Football Sack can exclusively reveal that on the back of President-elect Donald Trump’s unexpected rise to power, Football Federation Australia (FFA) has received a host of new applications for a place in the expanded version of the Hyundai A-League.

“Trump-vision”, that’s the term for it – TFS had it first, has seen the competition heat up for the 11th and 12th A-League licences and some of the originally favoured bids are feeling the pressure.

There are thought to be at least three new contenders, including:

Zeehan Zebras
FFA boss David Gallop reportedly now laughs uncontrollably when someone mentions the original Tasmanian bid after hearing the Zeehan Zebras’ pitch. With one of the lowest median house prices around the country the Tasmanian consortium is proposing to scrap the traditional idea of using currency to pay their squad in favour remunerating them with houses instead.

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A row of houses in Zeehan, Tasmania

It’s understood with a population of around, 700 every resident will also have job to do at the club with the butcher, the baker and candlestick maker already offering to operate the Fox Sports cameras. Should the bid be successful it’s expected the Zebras will have no problem recruiting Australian bred talent as it will be the only way young players can get into the housing market.

Betoota Bollocks
On the back of a boom in the readership of their local newspaper, The Betoota Advocate, the sleepy Queensland town is going through a remarkable resurgence bucking the trend of many other rural communities throughout Australia.

Coming after the announcement of their new locally brewed beverage of refreshing nature, Betoota Bitter, their local football side has emphatically declared the town is ready for the next step and are keen to take flight in country’s premier football grade. The only apparent sticking point is the Bollocks’ insistence that if anything other than their own signature bitter is served at games the local roustabouts will riot.

West Wyalong Wombats
If the West Wyalong bid is to believed there is no other tight-knit local community around the country more deserving of a spot in the A-League. A source close to the club’s owner said it’s not uncommon to see locals out on the Wombats’ pitch with scissors in hand in a painstaking effort to ensure every blade of grass is perfect.

Home ground of West Wyalong Wombats
Home ground of West Wyalong Wombats

A critical element of the Wombats’ pitch is the creation of a new rivalry between the Central NSW squad and Perth Glory called “The Big Purple”, with both club’s purple playing strips iconic throughout world football. Gallop is reportedly keen on the idea but prefers the name “The Big Bruise-up” to try and steal some market share in the rugby league and Australian rules obsessed town.

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Editor of The Football Sack and former graduate who now works in the ancient and noble art of print media.