5 reasons to stop watching the A-League this week

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Pfft, as if the 35k that poured through the gates of Allianz would have enjoyed themselves. 

The Sky Blues lost and we all know Sydneysiders are bandwagoning so and sos who wouldn’t know good football if it was hit from 30 yards out, curved several meters and banged them on the top corner of their head. Five goal thriller? More like five shades-worse-than-the-filmclip-to Thriller.

You should stop watching the A-League. Hell, you should stop watching football completely after such a horrible weekend. Here’s why.

1. Hayden Foxe may burn your eyes
It’s probably a brilliant costume to wear this Halloween as it’s one of the most scary images we at The Football Sack can think of. Perhaps new Heart signing Vinny Grella can talk Hayden Foxe out of his full kit… and into an Aloisi-styled suit.

2. A Rado Vidosic led Roar may thump teams 10 zip
After whacking Victory by five the Brisbane squad will comfortably beat teams such as Wanderers and Sydney. Everyone keeps claiming that the A-League is a level playing field because of the salary cap. But it’s not. Somehow those Bris-Vegas fiends are bucking the trend and smacking their opposition for six. It’s just not cricket.

3. The charity fundraising is far too girly
We don’t want to dress up in pink, and we don’t want to see our heroes looking like dolled-up vaginas. The $15 000 raised by the Mariners this weekend could be better donated to more masculine charities like Diggin’ holes for Africa and Punching Cancer.

4. No cakes in the Cake Tin
Lying bastards.

5. Can’t get tickets to the Sydney derby
You can’t even buy tickets to this fixture anymore because it’s sold out. What a load of crock. I wanted to go but was waiting for the sport to become popular before I spent my hard-earned.

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Matt Greenlaw
Editor of The Football Sack for three years, Matthew now spends his time sipping merlot whilst watching the reruns of Thursday FC.

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