With all the talk of National Premier Leagues and promotion/relegation as a way forward for Australian football, potential A-League expansion franchises seem to have been shelved for the time period.
Now as the FFA are busy dealing with all of those arrangements, I have saved them the time of costly market analyses and other feasibility studies.
Here is where they could swell the A-League and develop our game the old school way:
1. Melbourne Knights – Because just in case Mark Viduka is reincarnated, we need an A-League platform for the Duke.
2. Second Adelaide Side – So Adelaide fans can hate each other as much as they hate Melbourne Victory.
3. Gold Coast II – Face it, you all miss Clive Palmer and who doesn’t like an away trip to a place better than where you live? Palmer loves sinking ships, perhaps a second version will succeed.
4. WSW B – Surely enough passion and atmosphere for two teams. “Who do you sing for, we sing for Wanderers. And Wanderers B also”.
5. Dandenong Thunder – If 1500 can cause such a ruckus from week to week, it would be irresponsible to not let 15000 cause FFA Disciplinary proceedings.
6. South Melbourne FC – Time to put up or shut up. Oceania club of the century needs a chance to become World club of the century.
7. Tasmania FC – There’s no competition. MARKET MONOPOLY. Who cares if no market exists in the first place.
8. Geelong – Doing ok in other areas of sport. Opening signing: Ruben Zadkovich to star as the new Gary Ablett.
9. Darwin United –Save our players money on flights to the Middle East for their next paycheck.
10. Kalgoorlie – Financially viable because after training the lads can jump down a shaft and make some money for the franchise in the mines.
11. Canberra – Tom Rogic probably has siblings and other family, lets base a whole side around them.
12. More Sydney‘s – Why not have South Sydney, North Sydney and East Sydney? Let’s be fair.
13. Mt Isa – We’ve tried everywhere else in QLD, give them a crack.
14. Oakleigh Cannons – Because their souvlaki is delicious.
15. Airlie Beach FC or Byron Bay FC – Wherever those backpackers go because there is plenty of “foreign talent’’ there. No shortage of blokes putting their hands up to be chief scout of all that foreign talent.
16. Culina FC – Because by the time we expand the A–League Jason and his Dad Branko will have fallen out with every club in the league and will have no-where else to go.
17. Bundaberg FC – Frank Farina needs somewhere to go next and we assume he likes rum, so send him to the source! First player signing: Liam Reddy.
18. Tahitian National Team – We should put them in so there is someone Wellington Phoenix can finish above.
With these sure successes we can soon have exactly what all of us Australian football fans want: six professional leagues and all the relegations one club can handle before they crumble as an entity and die a painful, painful death.
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